There’s been a lot of talk throughout the year about how Oprah Winfrey’s network, OWN, has not lived up to its potential since debuting in January, looked upon as something of a ratings and content wash-out. Before anyone starts weeping for the failure of the one-time queen of the talk circuit’s ambitious venture, let us consider this—was another network really necessary in the first place? Is it just me, or is there something a bit too ambitious about deciding that having had your own highly successful, long-running show was not enough; that you needed to step up even higher on the television food chain by actually creating a entire, round-the-clock network? Certainly Oprah had the vast following to cultivate interest upfront, but aren’t we all a wee bit overwhelmed by the amount of programming that keeps filling the airwaves? I’m sure there are networks out there you and I have never heard of; I’m absolutely certain there are plenty we’ve never seen or even sampled, for lack of time or interest.

Speaking of sampling … As is common on the internet, you can actually go to the OWN site and get a taste of some of the programming that has recently debuted on the channel. I don’t know if I’d call it a strong argument for keeping OWN around, considering some of what you get.

For example, there’s a reality show called Don’t Tell the Bride, which finds it oh-so cutesy/funny that most men have no interest whatsoever in their own weddings and would behave like philistines given the chance to make all the plans themselves. A bride-to-be, anticipating her man’s dubious choices in wedding gowns and catering services, adamantly tells you “If they’re  not what I like—I’m out the door.” How’s that for true love? Worry not, this is OWN, after all. And despite the fact that the show’s narrator makes sarcastic comments throughout about the groom’s questionable taste, love triumphs in the end and even the shabby stuff looks good to the bride because … well, she’s on television! Oh, and she’s in love too, I guess. When it’s all over, if your first reaction is the need to see this premise every week … well, then you need to get out more … and I don’t mean going to weddings.

Another show, Ask Oprah’s All-Stars, presents advice from an “all-star” line-up of self-help gurus, Dr. Phil, Dr. Oz, and Suze Orman. This covers things like “should I spank the child?” (only if he won’t stop texting after bumping into pedestrians on the street, if you ask me), and an age test that requires standing on one leg for an extended amount of time. (I know, you’re trying it right now, aren’t you?). Most unsettling is a drop-by by a 52-year-old virgin so her new boyfriend can propose to her! When she assures the audience that she’s going to remain ‘untouched’ until the wedding night, the crowd applauds rather than vote to have her hauled off the stage in a butterfly net. Why am I thinking this wedding night might be a bit of anti-climax? 

Welcome to Sweetie Pie’s takes us inside a popular St. Louis eatery run by Robbie Montgomery, a former backup singer for Ike & Tina Turner. Sounds like a 15-minute segment on 60 Minutes or 20/20 doesn’t it? Is there really enough drama and excitement watching someone run a restaurant to the degree that this place has to be visited week after week? Wouldn’t it have been more creative to invent a dramatic version and bring in talented script writers to make it cook? 

So far, so what …  Plus you can get these things pretty much on a loop, as they play all over the OWN schedule, which makes sense when it comes to filling the hours on a brand new network. You even get reruns of old Oprah episodes. But this all seems like a concerted effort to avoid trying anything akin to, say … scripted, fictional material. Surely Oprah has cultivated enough friends in the acting, writing, and directing fields over the years to give this a shot.

At least Winfrey had the good idea to see if Rosie O’Donnell could make a go at another talk show, which is what she was always best at. Unlike most people who host such things, O’Donnell always seemed to be interested in talking to the guests and knew their work. (Remember how frequently Johnny Carson would tell his guest he had not seen their movies, not watched their series, or not heard their records?) On her previous, daytime show she was always a champion of Broadway music and made sure that the casts of current shows performed numbers, but this seems less of a sure thing here, as this time she’s situated in Chicago. The Rosie Show has got the others in the line-up beat by a nose, but is this the start of something good or just a rehash of something that’s over and done with?

But there are other questions to ponder … Is it time to call a moratorium on starting more networks? Isn’t there enough out there already to satisfy even the most unsatisfied among us? If you had the power to run an entire network, would you make sure Don’t Tell the Bride was among the first things you’d put on your schedule? Aren’t there enough channels nobody’s watching? It makes me think of how new malls pop up along the Jersey highways next to closed malls that already failed, rather than, say, the developer opening a new business in a previously developed space. Maybe Sweetie Pie’s and that yucky Bride show could run their course on an existing network, and the cable universe would be a little more manageable and easier to keep tabs on.