TV Vampire (s)Takedown
And the winner is... SPIKE!
William the Bloody (awful poet) takes the honors in our poll. It seems audiences like a bad boy, particularly when he's a blond Adonis who gets all the best lines. Spike is a sublime fantasy boyfriend: funny, devoted, and capable of razing a house to the ground with the ferocity of his lovemaking, all the while harboring a nasty unpredictable streak that keeps things from getting boring.
Thanks to all who participated...and condolences to my beloved Count Floyd.
(1997 to 2004)
(2008 to present)
(2009 to present)
(1972 to present)
Why do they call him The Count? Because he loves to count! Sesame Street’s most elegant muppet, Count Von Count, substitutes bloodlust with a mania for tabulation—a bit perplexing, really, but he gets style points for the monocle and the best evil laugh ever. Ha ha ha ha ha! (After reports that his laugh, accompanied by crashing thunder, scared small children, Sesame Street has toned down the Count’s spookier attributes.).47%Julian Luna
Kindred: The Embraced was a short-lived series, but its premise—a series of highly variable vampire clans participate in an elaborate “Masquerade” to live among humans—was intriguing; it was sort of The West Wing of vampire shows, with Mark Frankel’s Prince Julian more of a harried bureaucrat than romantic monster.Kurt Barlow
Stephen King’s 1970s miniseries deviated from the sexy/suave vampire model to horrifying effect. The vampire’s manservant, Straker, as played by iconic British actor James Mason, provided the continental charm and patrician bearing normally associated with the traditional children of the night; Barlow, the vampire proper, harked back to the rodent-like, repulsively terrifying Nosferatu of Murnau’s classic silent film. Barlow was an indelible image of horror, and occupied the heart of one of television’s most genuinely frightening vampire tales.
(1976 to 1984)
Joe Flaherty’s SCTV newsman Floyd Robertson, the serious, competent foil to Eugene Levy’s hapless coanchor Earl Camembert, moonlighted as the vampire-themed host of the fictitious network’s cheesy late-night horror program "Monster Horror Chiller Theater." Floyd’s zany howls of terror, sweaty pleas for the kids to send in money for 3-D glasses, and desperate catchphrase “wasn’t that scary?” (the movies were inevitably, pathetically poor) all indicated Robertson’s well-documented drinking problem held sway in the wee hours of a long broadcasting day. Count Floyd wasn’t scary in a traditional sense, but his very existence—was Robertson forced to take this gig to pay for rehab and alimony?—was sad and disturbing. And hilarious.
Kolchak: The Night Stalker was a precursor to (which was a precursor to , for our younger readers), a supernaturally themed thriller program whose eponymous investigative reporter covered the freaky beat. In the first Kolchak outing, our hero tracks Janos Skorzeny, a serial killer, who turns out to be a vampire. In one tense scene, Kolchak confronts Skorzeny in a hospital, where the vamp is stealing blood. Kolchak proved that vampires could be viable and scary in a completely contemporary, banal setting, a notion that has inspired many subsequent chroniclers of the undead..03%